Tuesday, June 20, 2006

"Look at that guy! He's got a beard and he's riding a scooter!" ~Steven Baxter


This is the house that I was talking about in my last blog. I took a picture of it the day I got back from EFY. Quite a good picture, too, if I do say so myself. I'll add more pictures from EFY as I progress, I don't want to add them all now. But isn't this a gorgeous house? I get to bike past it any time I want. Sometimes I just stop and look at it because it's so beautiful. This really is an amazing place. On Saturday night Mom and I went down to the beach and walked up and down until the sun set. Just standing there with the city just to the left of the setting sun, with the breeze in your face and the waves gently rolling beside you. It was so amazing. I wish everyone I loved could have been there then. But then again, it was nice to just have Mom and I enjoy a quiet moment together. Either way, it was perfect the way it was. It was incredible.

EFY, by the way, was also incredible. I learned so much about the Lord Jesus Christ, and so much about the love that Heavenly Father has for me, and for all of His children. One thing that really hit me, was I was in a class about how much Heavenly Father loves you no matter what you're going through. And we were watching a clip from a conference talk, and I don't even remember who was speaking, but he said "Heavenly Father loves us so much more than our happiness." And that really got to me, because as the class went on and as I pondered on that, it is so true. Heavenly Father knows when he needs to send trials to us, and He knows when we need hardships in our lives, because He knows the outcome. He knows that it will be better for us in the end. On of the analogies that our teacher, Bro. Martin, gave to us, is taking his daughter in for her shots. He said that what if he had given in to her crying and pleading and not had her have to get a shot and then years later, she had developed polio because she didn't get that shot. When she came to him and asked him why she had polio, could he look at her and say, "it's because I love you. It's because I love you so much that I wouldn't let them give you that shot." A few moments of pain is infinitely better than a lifetime of suffering. We need to realize that the trials we have now are given to us because Heavenly Father loves us. He loves us so much, that He has to let us have that shot, because He knows that
that shot will prevent us from so much more pain. And He won't let us suffer any more than we need to suffer. Heavenly Father will only give us the trials that we need. He doesn't just hand out trials randomly. He knows us, each and every one of us, and He knows what we individually need. I guess that's what I really really got this last week. It was emphasized over and over, and that was what I needed to hear the most. It was truly awesome.

K, this has been going on for three days now, I keep trying to add more pictures and it won't let me, so forget about that.

Silly how I was talking about trials and then yesterday was one of the worst days I've had while I have lived here. I'm not trying to make anyone feel bad, in fact, I don't want anyone to feel bad, but I just need to get it off my chest. I just started crying and crying and I couldn't stop. I seriously haven't cried that much in a long long time. I just sat on the couch and hugged my legs and cried. Finally, I called Liz and talked to her for a while and it really helped. I just get so lonely, knowing that I can't call anyone up to go hang out, or that no one will stop by to say hi. And I can't keep calling people because I'm sure the phone bill is extremely expensive because of me. So finally after talking to Liz I cried some more, put in a Sherlock Holmes movie to distract me, and took a little nap. It was bad. That's how Mom found me when she got home. But luckily she's an amazing mother and made me a fruit shake and took me out. We went to Blockbuster and got the Matrix and then we went down to the beach for another walk. I should have brought my camera with me, but don't worry, we'll go again. Because it was so beautiful. The sun had already set but the horizon was fiery as the stars were coming out. I walked along the beach with my feet in the warm waves (yes, warm). We saw a fish once, all flashing silver in the shallow water. The ocean was the color of filtered moonlight and it was amazing. I need to have moments like this more often.

I had a really nice dream last night, that involved me going to prom with a very attractive young man who looked like the doctor from A Flea In Her Ear. Those who saw the show (and are female) know what I'm talking about. And he liked me. That was a plus. That dream also included me walking on water with the guy from King of Queens. Talk about weird. Don't worry, I wrote it all down in my dream journal. I also had a half dream yesterday morning after signing up for classes (which includes Russian, if I do say so) that was about me meeting my guardian angel. Pretty cool.

Ok, I am dying of heat, so I think I'm going to get some ice cream and watch Ordinary People, which is an amazing movie and I recommend it to everyone. I bought it today on sale, along with Edward Scissorhands. Oh, how my DVD collection is growing. I actually went to buy the Incredibles, but they only had it in fullscreen. Oh please. Anyway, I love you all, and miss you tons, so don't hesitate to ring me up! Love to all and to all a good day. Shalom

2 comments:

pev said...

Oh sorry. This is like the 50th time I've read the post and I had the retarded feeling of, "duh... beckah wants a comment, just like I always do." COMMENT! Hey.. I think I am going to call you tonight. My week has been slightly-boring.. but I am keeping busy. So yah.. I am.. I am going to call you tonight! ADIOS!

Beckah said...

Good idea! I'll be anxiously waiting by the phone. Well, not really. But I hope to talk to you. Ciao!

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Into the Maze of a Mind by Rebekah Whittaker is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.