"There had to be a substratum, but its composition was unimaginable." ~American Pastoral
Sunday, November 13, 2005
Every day I walk His way. I seek His light. Do you see it in my eyes?
I wanted to start off with this excerpt from A Series of Unfortunate Events #12:The Penultimate Peril.
"We can ask for a second helping of pound cake, even though someone has made it quite clear that we will not get any. We can ask for a new watercolor set, even though it will be pointed out that we never used the old one, and that all of the paints dried into a crumbly mess. We can ask for Japanese fighting fish, to keep us company in our bedroom, and we can ask for a special camera that will allow us to take photographs even in the dark, for obvious reasons, and we can ask for an extra sugar cube in our coffees in the morning and an extra pillow in our beds at night. We can ask for justice, and we can ask for a hankerchief, and we can ask for cupcakes, and we can ask for all the soldiers in the world to lay down their weapons and join us in a rousing chorus of 'Cry Me a River,' if that happens to be our favorite song. But we can also ask for something we are much more likely to get, and that is to find a person or two, somewhere in our travels, who will tell us that we are noble enough, whether it is true or not. We can ask for someone who will say, 'You are noble enough,' and remind us of our good qualities when we have forgotten them, or cast them into doubt."
As I was reading this the other day, I couldn't help but think about the tender mercies of the Lord, and how much He has done to show me that I am a daughter of God and that I matter to Him. This may come in the form of other people, people who compliment you or just enjoy your company when your self-confidence is low. I know that the Lord has blessed me with many many tender mercies, and everyday I see indications that we are a chosen generation, and that He esteems us in His eyes. I am so grateful that the Lord blesses me in tiny ways, to show me that I am loved by Him, and that He wants me to come live with Him again.
In sacrament meeting today (1st ward sacrament), just after I took the sacrament, I looked down at the program and it had a picture of Christ with the little children around Him, and He has this beautiful smile on His face. And as I was sitting there, I could almost picture Him, in that chapel, waiting for me. And I imagined myself running into His arms, and feeling His arms wrap around me, and whispering in my ears, "Well done, thou good and faithful servant." And I realized just how excited I was to see the Lord and to behold His face, and to feel His love while I look upon Him. Whether in this life or in the life to come, I can't wait to touch His hands and feet, and to have Him hug me with a love I've never known. I know I'll still make mistakes in my life, but I can't imagine Christ being disappointed in me, and so I'm doing all I can to serve Him and His children here on Earth. I want Him to be proud of me.
We watched a movie today in Sunday School about missionary work across the world (hence the picture) and I can't tell you how excited I am to go on a mission. I am willing to sacrifice all I need to be able to serve the Lord's children in a different land, or in this land if He so chooses to send me. But in the video, especially when they talked about the people from the Pacific Islands and the people from Eastern Europe, I felt an immense sense of gratitude for the missionaries who were brave enough to go to those countries to spread the gospel. I don't know why I love the Polynesian people so much, I've only been to Hawaii once and I know a family from Samoa, but I feel such an attachment to them. And also the people of Germany, because I've been there. I know what wonderful people are there, and I've seen where the Berlin wall once stood, and so I know how incredible it must have felt to be free from physical and spiritual bondage. I would love to serve a foreign mission, but I will go wherever the Lord sends me. And I will go, no matter what.
In this book I finished recently, The Silver Chalice, (which takes place in Rome soon after Christ's ministry), one of the characters is telling the main character (Basil) about the spirit Basil has felt while searching for the apostles. He tells Basil that he may believe in Jesus Christ, but he will someday reach the point where he simply wants to preach the gospel to everyone around him, and to tell the world of the joy he has felt through the gospel of Jesus Christ. What a true statement. There are times when I'm going about my life that I get so excited about the gospel that I simply can't hold it in, and I want to shout to the world how happy I am, and how they too can be happy by coming to the Lord. What an opportunity to be able to serve the Lord as a full-time missionary, to bring the truth to the children of God. What an amazing calling. I can't wait till that time comes.
To the many of you who will read this, you have been an immense blessing in my life, those that I have met here and those that I have left behind. Your influence in my life has helped me chose the better part, and for that I am eternally grateful. I love you all deeply. May joy fill your lives, even in times of trial. Shalom
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